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Before Breaking Up Your Relationship Ask Yourself 7 Important Questions

first_imgA year after divorce, a woman’s quality of life decreases by 73%, and a man’s — by 42%. That’s why psychologists recommend not making decisions in the heat of the moment, especially if you want to leave your partner. Ask youself a few questions first and think everything over thoroughly.Everyone sooner or later encounters a situation where they have to make a hard choice — like to save a relationship hoping that it will go back to normal, or to break up.Psychologists don’t recommend leaving a partner who you really love, but there’s no point in clinging to the “OK-but-not-great” relationships that oppress you. It’s important to make a decision that you won’t be sorry about in future.We suggest you ask yourself these questions. They will help you have a look at your relationships with your partner from a different perspective.1. Do these relationships help to bring out the best in me?Do you feel that you are the best version of yourself now? In normal relationships, a partner usually supports, encourages, and admires when the other partner achieves new things, he/she also encourages self-development, and encourages new hobbies in the other partner.On the other hand, if you feel that your partner pulls you down and prevents you from developing at your chosen pace, then that’s a reason to think things over. Your discontent with each other will probably only increase in future.2. Do we have common goals and plans for the future?This is a very important thing. If you want to live a life full of traveling, parties with friends, adventures, and bright moments, and your partner is a homebody and an introvert, then you’d probably have conflicts because of this.The plans regarding family, work, etc. are no less important. If you believe that you need to build a successful career first and then make plans to have children while your partner supports you, that’s great. Common plans and views will minimize your arguments.3. Do we speak with each other?We are all adults who have our own interests and responsibilities outside of our relationships. But nothing should be more important than love. Sometimes, it can happen that the problems become bigger than the relationship and our talks with each other. But this should never be a regular thing.On the other hand, if you feel that you are always number two to your partner, and he/she is not interested in your life while you treat him/her in the same way, then, maybe, you simply don’t need this relationship.4. Do I feel happy or upset most of the time?This criteria helps you look at your relationships clearly. If you have insignificant problems but most of the time you feel comfortable, peaceful, and warm by your partner’s side, then that’s a good sign.On the other hand, it can happen that partners have almost no problems but they feel upset and unhappy with each other. This is a signal that should never be ignored.5. Do we both make compromises?Any relationship is impossible without compromises, because you are two different people and your views cannot coincide all the time.If you feel that you often have to sacrifice your interests for the sake of your partner, then that’s a bad sign. These relationships have no future.6. Why do I want to break up with this person?Sometimes, it’s hard to formulate the reasons for your unhappiness in your relationships, but if we say them out loud, we may feel awkward. Like, am I going to break up with a person so dear to me because of such a silly thing?Try to identify those reasons for yourself. Figure out whether they are serious and whether you can change the situation if you both apply effort. Only after that should you make your decision.7. Will my life be better if we break up?Imagine your life without this partner in a few years. What do you feel? If you know that you’ll definitely be happier than now, make your move despite all the difficulties. Money and stability are important, but they can’t be the reason for you to stay with a person who doesn’t love you. Spend time sorting these questions out before you break up.Sourcelast_img read more

12 Countries Sign Historic Agreement Guaranteeing Environmental Rights in Latin America and the Caribbean

first_imgAir pollution can threaten the health and well-being of entire communities. Perhaps no one knows this better than villagers from Quinteros and Puchuncaví, Chile.The two towns have been dealing with air pollution from nearby industrial parks since the 1970s. High levels of sulfur dioxide and particulate matter have damaged crops and sickened children, elderly people and animals. While the government has prepared a decontamination plan, there have already been at least two more air pollution episodes just this year that affected local schools and communities.While citizens from Quinteros and Puchuncavi have demanded a limit on industrial expansion, their power is limited: Chile lacks laws that ensure citizens’ rights to participate in decontamination planning and standard-setting.The plight of citizens from Quinteros and Puchuncavi highlights the need for the Escazú Agreement, a historic treaty that guarantees environmental rights in Latin America and the Caribbean. Also known as the Regional Agreement on Access to Information, Public Participation and Justice in Environmental Matters, or LAC P10, the Agreement presents three fundamental rights for sound environmental governance: access to information, access to public participation and access to justice. Twelve countries committed today to sign the Agreement, enough to ensure that it will move forward and be brought into force once ratified. Antigua and Barbuda, St. Lucia, Costa Rica, Guyana, Mexico, Panama, Uruguay, Peru, Ecuador, Brazil, Guatemala and Argentina have signed so far, with more expected to join today. The Agreement is open for signature for the other 21 countries in the region until 2020.Why the Escazú Agreement Is So ImportantEnvironmental conflicts are particularly rampant in Latin America. In 2017, four environmental defenders were killed every week in the region, according to a report from Global Witness. The Escazú Agreement provides special protections for environmental human rights defenders, including:Guaranteeing a safe environment for people and organizations that promote and defend human rights in environmental matters, so they remain free from threats, restrictions and insecurityTaking steps to recognize, protect and promote all the rights of environmental defendersImplementing measures to prevent, investigate and punish attacks, threats or intimidation against environmental defendersThe Escazú Agreement is also designed to make it easier for nearly 500 million people to access information, participate in decision-making processes that affect their lives, and hold powerful interests accountable. Countries adopting the Agreement will ensure that the most vulnerable groups and those in poverty will be included in the environmental decision-making processes that directly affect them — such as the approval of mines, addressing pollution, and land use planning and policymaking. It has provisions that put pressure on governments to offer support, including legal aid, to those seeking their rights to information, participation or justice, including when facing environmental damages such as air or water pollution. The Agreement also focuses on improving national laws on access to information, including in countries that currently lack such laws, such as Barbados, St. Lucia and others.What Happens Next?The treaty is open for 33 countries in the UN Economic Commission for Latin America and Caribbean (UNECLAC). Now that 12 have signed, the next step is for them to ratify the Agreement and ensure their laws comply with the provisions. Once 11 countries ratify, the Agreement will officially enter into force and implementation can begin.Implementation will include a review of national legislation and practice within each country. This may include engagement with private sector actors on new rules for public participation and environmental impact assessments; investments in capacity-building to ensure governments can provide access to a broad range of environmental information in an affordable, proactive and timely manner; and broadening legal aid for environmental damage and loss of environmental rights.Getting More Countries on BoardIt’s clear that citizens throughout Latin America and the Caribbean want the Escazú Agreement. More than 33,000 people across the region signed a petition urging their governments to sign it.Strengthening environmental democracy is vital. Countries that have signed the Agreement have made it clear that they’re committed to protecting the environmental rights of their citizens. Those that haven’t still have time to get on board.last_img read more

Learning from the Past Imagining the Future a w

first_img“Learning from the Past, Imagining the Future” a workshop which took place in Manantial del Corazon, Spain, on October 13 to 15, 2017. By Carlos, Stefan, Ruben, Francesca, FFWPU SpainThere is uncertainty in every moment of transition. But it is the way we face change that makes transitions an opportunity for growth and transformation. We explored this theme through all the stories and conversations we had in this gathering, under a setting we already experienced in Exploring the Essential, our previous workshop this year.Eleven testimonies and presentations from different people showed how much has been going on in the past years within our Unification community, as individuals and as a group: break-ups and divorces in our own families, intergenerational Blessings, siblings that left the Movement, and friends that reconnected after many years and experiences. Many of us would have never imagined listening to these stories fifteen years ago in the same place where we were meeting again: stories of growth, fidelity, loss, recovery, digging deeper, reimagining our faith and relationships. How have all these events shaped our life of faith, our love relationships, and our community through the years? How did we change?It was important for us to recognize and accept, as a community, the distance between ideals and reality. So, we took the time and the courage to share those stories, remember that we are not alone, be generous and compassionate towards each other, expand the conversation, and try to ask ourselves better questions. How did you face the biggest challenges of your life? How can we create better spaces to share those difficulties? What were the crucial moments in your relationships that made them last or come to an end? If “love” is one of the most important words in our lives, what experiences bring meaning to it? How did your faith evolve throughout these years? What would you change in our common speech as a community? How do you imagine our community can flourish in the future?Once again, we realized that, despite our lives not being perfect, we still long for the same ideals, and we share the same desire to live lives full of meaning, love, friendship and belonging. Remembering them, sharing our stories of growth and overcoming, eating together, singing together, laughing together in Luisa’s therapy sessions, along with our growing families, kids and babies: it all helps us to bring out the best in ourselves and to not forget that it is necessary to accept and forgive to heal.We believe that taking the time to do these things has secretly been a shifting moment to our youth community.Thank you to all of you who were there, walking with us through the transition.last_img read more